Tuesday, 12 October 2010

Why I hate online gaming

I don't play online games much. It used to be because I couldn't be fucked trying to win against dozens of unstoppable pre-adolescent killing machines who clearly don't do anything else but play online games. I don't have the time or the drive to get that good, so it stops being fun.

Lately thought I've experienced something of a gaming renaissance, I've been playing Dead Rising 2, and I've had a stab at playing the Online Beta for the Assassin's Creed 2 Brother hood game. Both are relatively new and well balanced so you actually have a shot at winning.

The problem is, in a nutshell, assholes with microphones. It seems to be impossible to get games without some twat on the other end saying all manner of outlandish shit over the game. It's like they've employed some foul mouthed white trash kid to do narration over the whole game. Just before I played a game where some dude was like "ohh, fuck, cunt, fuck" over the whole game. I like a good cussin' session as much as the next guy, but it's unbearable to try and play when you're assaulted with this level of uneducated bullshit (Although I will concede that it's really satisfying to kill someone in the game and immediately hear "Ohh what, that prick just killed me"). I constantly find myself uselessly yelling at the screen "SHUT. THE FUCK. UP." I'll quit the game, and then have to wait ten minutes until getting a game without some asshole commentary.

So please. Game developers, in your next online game, please incorporate a "mute chodes" option. Thanks.

Sunday, 3 October 2010

Dead Rising 2

So I got Dead Rising 2 a week or so ago, and I just finished my first playthrough this morning.

Set five years after the original Dead Rising, DR2 takes place in a world adjusted to the presence of the Undead. It seems that these Zombies are fairly well controlled, even to the extent that infected people can take a drug called Zombrex every 24 hours to stave off turning into a zombie. A massive game show, Terror is Reality (think American Gladiators with Zombies) exploits hordes of the undead for entertainment.